Soul of the Departed

The cuts that bled, the tears we shed, for the last years we spent, now were heading down this path, the beginning of a story that ended prematurely, to see you grinning, I'm glad we befriended each other, we were like brothers, closest of homies, showed me the ropes, having high hopes, days on haviture way, the heart of gold, the heart and soul among the 4, neighborhood kids, playing in the streets, chilling at the crib, it was different on the block every week, in my, rinse repeat catholic school life, momma wasn't right, saying you're a bad influence, believed I'll be truant, disobedient to my elders, I had to tell her, everybody I hang with, wasn't with the gang shit, pardon my language, but this anguish lingers, numbness in my fingers, it's the stress that gets to me, is God testing me, I need to repent, goto church, but I lost my faith when I saw your casket in the hearse, on bended knee, making a plea, hoping you hear me, asking for forgiveness, but the distance between us was as far as me screaming to Venus, clenched fist, powerless, depression taken over, was never sober, binge drinking to stop thinking, held on to our memories, but it wasn't enough, a temporary crutch.

I couldn't find peace, drowning myself in alcohol, emotionally weak, for weeks, never dealt with the way it's suppose to be, trying to find closure, but the closer I came, the further everything felt, wanting this pain to disappear, and hear you say keep your head up, yet I was fed up, suicidal tendencies, apparently, i swore my friend had left me, insides feeling empty, the days grew on, I was trapped, had me within it's grasp, yet, couldn't dwell on the past, had to move on, defeat my demons, believing you're watching over us, through these changing seasons, you're the main reason I kept going with my writing, fighting through the rough times, the tough kinds, that makes any man breakdown, but I understand what's at stake now, I'm finally awake now.


R.I.P my nigga Mike.